The Super Simple Way to Cube a Pineapple

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So, this past year, Brendan tried his hand at Wrestling.

Actually, he threw his entire body in the ring and twisted it into shapes only a master-Cirque-de-Soleil Contortionist should be able to do.

And I sat on the sidelines, biting my nails down to their nail’s nubs praying all of his joints remained purposefully intact.

He not only survived unscathed {minus a few conspicuous bruises here ant there}, but he learned what it means to face difficulty head-the-bleep-on and come out stronger.

That’s how I used to feel cubing pineapples.  Like I was tossed in a ring with a 356 pound gorilla in fluorescent blue tights ready to show me some pain.

But NO MORE.

And now, you’re going to know and it’s going to save your pineapple-carving life!

The Super Simple Way to Cube a  Pineapple.  Quick and Easy... like Sunday Morning's Sunday Morning!

To cube a pineapple, first tell it to take off those hideous blue wrestling tights cuz you’re about to whip it good.

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Next, cut the ends off both the bottom and the top.

how to cube a pineapple

Just ignore that brown looking thing in the middle.  It’s fine.

Next, cut your pineapple into quarters lengthwise.

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Told you I’m the one giving the bruises now, didn’t I?  Haha.

Then, turn each wedge and slice off the core.

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Now, we’re going to make some horizontal slices as we get ready for the Main Event.

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Cut each sliced wedge in half.

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Then turn each piece on its side and slice off the rind.

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Now, here’s where it gets sticky.  You HAVE to cut off a little more than the rind. It might feel like you are leaving some really good Pineapple-ness behind, but trust me…if you don’t, you’ll end up with some grody “eyes” left on your pineapple.

So go a little bit deeper than you reeeeeally want to as shown down below.

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But don’t worry… those leftover rinds? They won’t win.

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You see.. the human teeth are quite the champion when it come to wrestling a pineapple rind.

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Holy-Pineapple-Rinds! Is he not just the cutest thing you EVER did see?

I swear they’ll win every single time.

Juicy-juicy-fruity-fruity.

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Now you have some freakishly delicious and deftly cubed fresh Pineapple to share.

Or not.

Sharing perfectly cubed pineapple is definitely optional.

 

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