Well hello there! Welcome back to the redefining Bold podcast. You're listening to episode number 27 and I'm your host Gwen Whitfield from theboldabode.com, where I help warm-hearted women take small steps toward positive lasting change!

Today we’re talking about three quick, but POWERFUL, ways to motivate yourself.

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What to do when you don’t want to do something that you do want to do!

When was the last time you procrastinated doing something? If you’re like me, you are good at putting things off or just avoiding doing things.

The most frustrating thing is when it’s something that you know you really need to do, or maybe it’s something that you actually want to do. Why do we do that? I know sometimes it’s fear of failure or insecurity but what about simple things that don’t involve “failure”?

Like, cleaning your house? Now, I’ve set up some weekly routines, and you might know them from my Effortlessly Clean Home pdf that you might have (if you don’t you can go to theboldabode.com/subscribe to get it).

But like today, I have my list in my bullet journal and as I looked at it, I had this sinking feeling inside. Why is that? I do want to have a clean home. I love having a clean and organized home. It feels so good to have a clean home and I want to want to clean my home.

But as I scanned that short list, I had this feeling of mild dread. I’m just being very honest with you. Just because I teach mindset and have these great freebies for you, doesn’t mean that I still don’t have moments where I feel resistance.

So my plan for today, after I ate lunch, was to go to my office, sit my butt in the chair and write this episode. But before I started, as I was sitting here , I was feeling that same resistance. I feel it in my stomach and around my jaw.

This is one thing that I also recommend, it is becoming really familiar with your body and how it feels when you are on different emotions. As I have practice, just getting an understanding and awareness of my body is angry or sad, worried, or frustrated, it helps me to figure out how I really am feeling. Honestly, that could be an entire episode on its own!

Recognize this feeling when it was simple resistance. it takes effort to sit down and write and sometimes this effort can feel overwhelming beforehand.

Do you know what I mean?

In the past, feeling this kind of resistance would lead me to just telling myself I can do it later and then snuggling down on the couch with the cat to watch some Grey’s Anatomy.

Learning to recognize and be aware of what is happening is crucial and so helpful!

When you can see it for what it is and realize that this is truly keeping you from what you do want in life, for yourself, your home, your family, your career? That’s when you can use these three tactics to overcome this resistance and get busy getting stuff done!

Here are 3 ways to motivate yourself to do something that you need to do - a

think about the outcome and focus on how it feels to be done
I’ve talked about this technique in more detail in episode 3 - Chasing the feeling. But basically, it’s a simple method where instead of focusing on the task at hand, you imagine how it will feel to get it done, but even more - how it will feel when it IS done. This is such a powerful way to motivate yourself to get started because you’ve pulled in that positive emotion, that positive feeling, into your body physically. Some teachers call this, “alignment”. Getting into alignment with what you need to do is incredibly compelling and energizing!
Give yourself a personal pep talk!
I do this almost every morning when I first get up, or at any point during the day if I feel like I’m not doing what I need to do, or am feeling that I need some encouragement. Working from home, alone as a solopreneur can be very challenging. I don’t have a team to get feedback from or to brainstorm with or to have some general support! Now I do have a really great accountability partner that I meet with weekly. That has been such an incredible blessing this year!
To effectively do this, you’ve got to actually look in the mirror and tell yourself you can do it, you can get it done - out loud! There is something about seeing your own eyes and hearing your own voice cheering you on that is so empowering! When I started doing this about two years ago, I noticed afterwards that I was so much more positive and ready to work. It is something that I now call on several times a day if I need it. Pretty much every time I see myself in a mirror.
It reminds me of that Lizzo Song - Soulmate, Look up in the mirror like, “yeah, I’m in love”

I always feel so much better about myself and my life after a pep talk. I find that when I encourage myself and love on myself, I’m ready to tackle my day in a way I couldn’t have imagined 10 years ago.

There is nothing wrong with loving yourself. There is massive benefit to doing so. I’m not talking about stroking your ego and puffing yourself up, I’m talking about truly loving yourself and supporting yourself. If you have no one in your life that does that for you, you have yourself! I have a wonderful husband that loves me dearly, but he’s not the kind of guy that gushes complements and that’s OK. I have learned to take that into my own hands and have found so much value in doing it for myself.

Looking to other people to validate you is never going to give you that amazing experience that validating and believing in yourself will!

And when you create that excitement within yourself, that is what will propel you out of the starting gate and into the arena.

And that, my lovely friend, is where it’s at!

The third and final technique I use to motivate myself is called the Release Technique. I’m pretty sure I learned this from Brendan Burchard. He’s the guy that wrote, High Performance Habits - one of my very favorite books that I talked about in episode 22 where I talked about the power of competence.

The release technique is simple, whatever you are not wanting to do, for example, clean the toilet. You simply say, outloud to yourself,

I release my resistance to cleaning the toilet.

and you say it over and over until you feel the resistance melt away and you find yourself going to bathroom, picking up the toilet brush and cleaning that dang toilet!

I also find saying it in front a mirror while looking into your own eyes to be even more powerful.

This year, I want to realize some dreams that I’ve had for quite some time. And I’m using these three techniques, very intentionally, to help inspire and encourage me along the way.

In fact, I used the release technique to help me get my but in front of the computer and finish writing this episode.

It’s really exciting to watch it happen in my life and I hope this episode inspires you to try these three techniques in your own life. It takes some experimenting to find what works for you, but when you find it… watch out!

One of the things I said to myself in front of the mirror, right before I came in here to my office, was…

Gwen, I’m so proud of you for not giving up.

You see, During Christmas, while I was on my break, I actually considered chucking it all. The blog, the podcast, everything.

But after a zoom with my friend, Lindsey, from Enneagram 9 Stories who was in episode 25, I was encouraged and inspired to keep going.

And so, I didn’t give up and I’m so thankful and proud of myself that I am back and living out my purpose!

Now, I want to hear from you! Email me at [email protected] and let me know if you try any one of these techniques, and let me know how if worked and how it went.

Thanks so much for listening and I’ll see you in the next episode!